Fourth Child ?

My youngest turned one a few months back. As I see how his elder brother and sister enjoy playing and being his leader ( I simply mean bossing him around), I thought for a moment whether it would be great for him to have another sibling.

This was a a decision that I made for my eldest and second one. And the decision came easily then. 

But for this time round I was hesitant.

True enough the baby bonus, and CDA benefits are great for 4th child. Though there will be no additional tax benefit for me since I hit the limit. But, these benefits to me, are ' side effects' to my decision. They are never part of my decision.

During the pandemic, I got lots of time with the kids. But I also realized it was just tough to give all of them attention at the same time. My kids learnt less than I could teach if there were fewer kids, and I spent less time due to significant distraction by another ( e.g. diaper change, or just another kid making too much noise, etc.). To me, more kids would be sacrificing the current attention that I can give to any one.

I am getting old. When the kids are at home, whole day, I am exhausted by afternoon. Cannot imagine having more kids.

Another big consideration I have is space. Everyone needs space. Currently all my 3 kids share a single room. And there was once my daughter mentioned that she likes to be home when the brothers are away, as at least, she can play her own toys ( without them being snatched away suddenly). The time will come when the 2 boys want their own space too. I am considering a home with 4 bedrooms. Most new 5 room hdb flat just don't have 4 true blue bedrooms. The 4th room in a five room flat is just an extension of the living room. Perhaps it is big enough for a table but not for a bed with table and storage space. I looked at some condos, but the price for 4 bedroom is out of range for me. What's more, the living space is small. To me, moving to a condo is considered a downgrade if I have to forgo space. The swimming pool, the garden at the condo are  places that belong to just me. While there will be less people competing for such space compared to the public park or pool,  it is not my space.

 I looked at landed and cluster houses too. They are big enough. Now it becomes, whether I want to trade my freedom ( to be able to quit my job when I feel like it) for more physical space. 

Next factor is also related to space. But now it is car space. My sedan can only fit 5. Having more kids would mean a change in car ( or not having it). Not something that I would want to I'm the near future...

So, I guess I will stop at 3.

Main factors that made this decision was space and time.

Why topping up my CPF won't reduce my tax

It's going to be the end of the year, and there are many who are topping up their CPF to earn tax relief. For me, topping up my CPF will not reduce my tax in any way. So for me, I'm not going to top up this year. 

And the reason for that is simply because of this statement from IRAS:

A personal income tax relief cap of $80000 applies to the total amount of all tax reliefs claimed for each year of assessment.

So for individuals, note that your maximum amount of tax relief is capped at $80,000. Once you reach that sum, topping up your CPF will not help reduce your tax. 

I get a substantial tax relief from the working mom tax relief. The following is the tax relief for working moms:

• 15% of earned income for 1st child
• 20% of earned income for 2nd child
• 25% of earned income for 3rd child and beyond

As these relief are cumulative (meaning if you have 2 children, your tax relief is 15% + 20% = 35%), they become quite significant. With 3 kids, I qualify for 60% of tax relief of my earned income. This forms the bulk of my tax relief.

Another bulk of relief will be from my compulsory CPF contribution. Without us doing anything, a portion of our salary goes to CPF. This contribution is known as the compulsory employee CPF contribution, and they are included as part of my tax relief. 

After adding in my CPF and working mother tax relief, I've exceeded the personal income tax relief of $80,000. I like that IRAS highlight this (I copied this from IRAS' website):

Please note that a personal income tax relief cap of $80,000 applies to the total amount of all tax reliefs claimed (including relief on compulsory/ voluntary CPF contributions) for each Year of Assessment.

There will be no refund for accepted voluntary CPF contributions. Please evaluate whether you would benefit from tax relief on your voluntary CPF contributions and make an informed decision.

Well, part of my CPF contribution are taxed now OR you can look at it as I don't get the full 60%  working mom tax relief. Any way you look at it, topping up CPF in anyway will not reduce my tax. On a side note, this means based on current situation, I won't benefit from the additional tax relief for working mom if I have another kid. But honestly, whether I want more kids or not has nothing to do with tax, anyway.

Today's Christmas Eve! Have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Life as a Consultant

I've been working as a consultant for the past 8 years. There are many consultants in the world, and they do a wide variety of different roles. But my job as an engineering consultant is to advise clients on how to improve their processes, engineering design, and so on.

Pros of Being A Traveling Consultant

In terms of work, I am most blessed to visit so many companies, and people generously share information with me, broadening my horizon. The generous sharing was of course so that I can help them as much as possible. But, when can you go to people's control room as an external person, and get to look at all their standard operating procedures (SOP), their control panels? Few will get that opportunity. Because my consulting company has a wide variety of clients, I've visited so many different factories (producing the weirdest thing to the typical things) in so many countries. Many don't get so much exposure as me. 

Office politics is minimal. For our clients, I'm seen as an outsider, and well, there's no need for politics with me. In my company, I 'm rarely even in the office. There's little politics, apart from nasty emails from people I hardly know. I have little feeling towards nasty emails since I don't see the person writing it. I just interpret it as poor writing on their part. 

As a consultant, pre- COVID, it was a jet- setting life. While many financial bloggers are talking about credit card hacks to gain as many points to take business class (ok, not for first class though. I've never taken first class), I've taken my fair share of business class flights (Emirates, Asiana and SQ only actually) for flights more than 8 hours. Also, from the incredible amount of travel I have done (during peak period, I'm on the plane every alternate week), I have so many Krisflyer miles for upgrades to business class or simply free flights. No need any hack. But, I  started being sick of traveling in recent years. I haven't traveled for holidays for years. I had been clearing leave by staying home. I used krisflyer miles to exchange for ipads (and other stuff from Krisshop) - I know, people say it's get the least value per mile, but it suits me best.

From the many hotel stays that I had, I am able to exchange for free nights staying in suites for free. I've stayed in Le Meridien in Sentosa (good bye), and also W Sentosa's suite (go check out how much it cost) for free. I'm a lifetime silver member of Marriot Bonvoy and am midway to life- time gold. #notproudatall

Meals abroad are paid for. We don't get allowances for travel, just reimbursement for food, transport, hotel, airfares and other travel expenses. So, I have eaten loads of different great food. Hai Di Lao, Ding Tai Feng and so on? I've eaten them, overseas. Hairy crab? I get to eat how much I like, and it's not expensive in China (my clients will direct me to the right place). 

When I'm visiting clients based in Singapore, I take a cab to their factories. Grab points, comfort- delgro points? I have loads of them to exchange for my own free rides (e.g. when I need to go office, or simpy going out).

Of course, all this travel was pre- COVID. Now you must be thinking this is an excellent job, and you want to take it.  I've many friends who envy my job. But, I envy theirs.

Cons of Being A Traveling Consultant

I didn't mention the pros to brag. Instead, I want to show that for all the perks you get, there's a sacrifice to be made. It's just whether you mind the sacrifice. 

Firstly, health. When you are on the plane, do you know that you are subjected to high amounts of UV rays? In fact, while you are indoor, you need more sunblock on the plane (think- you are even nearer to the sun now!). When you are eating out so often, there is less control over the quality (and how healthy the food is). 

If you are not traveling, you get to celebrate birthdays, respond to emergencies, and so on. When you are overseas, it's hard. Even if you only have 8 hours working, the rest of the time you have, you can't go home. Yes, you can go round and see the sights of the country. I have been to Taiwan for business more than 20 times. Taiwan is great, many places to visit, but as a not very adventurous person, it's not so appealing anymore. 

Next, when you have kids, the time away from home is bad. To make up for the time I'm absent (and not able to teach them), I spent a lot of money on enrichment (which I could have taught). To manage the kids while I'm away, my partner give in to TV and screen time. 

So now, with COVID, there's little travel for consultants like me. Travel has been replaced with conference calls. For local clients, I still visit them. It seems I should like my job even more. You would say I should love my job now. 

But something in me wanted a change. Firstly, my company does not pay well. It justifies it with great benefits. But I prefer money.  My boss hasn't promoted me (ever since he had been my boss), and he'll tell me if I do A- Z, maybe the company will consider, but no guarantee. Then, they are thinking of sending us overseas, go for quarantine, then visit our clients. What are your thoughts on these? While it's not confirmed yet, to me, it's simply a matter of when. 

And I have my plans too

When COVID is finally under control worldwide, travel will resume. And I'm sure my company will make me travel every week to make up for the lost time. 

And for now, while the managers think of long trips with quarantine overseas, I want no part in it. Rather than stressing over what happens then, I bit the bullet.

Sometimes, we hang on to a job too tightly when it's no longer aligned with our values, thinking that we can't live without that job. But there's abundance in the world. There are many opportunities out there. It's just takes time and effort to uncover them. You just got  have patience and believe in yourself.

We have to let go of some things, so that we can let other things come. 

Cheers!

Of Travelling Job and Being a Mom

This article is inspired by SimplyJesMe's recent article on how motherhood has changed her perception for travelling. It resonates a lot with me. Like her, I have a travelling job. Unlike her, I'm still in the travelling job. Unlike her, after having my first child, I am weary of my travelling job, but yet stuck my head in it, and had my second and third child while still in the travelling job.  Unlike her, I do not have the courage to quit my 9 - 5 to start a business. Go read her blog or support her business, she's an inspiration! (This is NOT a sponsored post. I don't know Jes, and Jes didn't even know I wrote about her.)

I'm not travelling now. Simply because I am having my 16 weeks of maternity leave, currently. However, my 16 weeks are going to be up soon (in just a few weeks' time), and I will be going back to my (travelling) job. Looking at my work schedule, I have yet any travels due to the coronavirus. Either the clients do not want us there, or we can't go there (e.g. China). The entire office is at low workload currently (not sure whether we will be asked to go for no-pay leave, or what'll happen if this continues). 

With three kids, I am thinking of what should be the best move ahead.

Staying in my current job or changing a job?

I won't be promoted for many years to come. I guess the 48 weeks of maternity leave in 4 years has an impact on my career. Also, there's some change in organization structure, and some power struggle going on top, which in short is not to my advantage. If I go back to work, I can cruise through. Except for the travelling which sucks -- my partner will need to care for 3 demanding kids and I'll miss them dearly. 

I can look for another job. To command a similar salary or even more, I'll likely be in the same industry, which again involves intense travel (except maybe for now). However, pay will be better, and perhaps better prospects. A new job will mean spending more time understanding how the company operates, the new standards they use. Apart from time away due to travelling, it will also take my free time away as I work beyond 9 to 5 to get up to speed. Not my priority now.

Look for a job in another sector? There's not a lot of things that I like. I can do technical talks, I can teach technical stuff, do technical calculations and engineering designs. But, I don't want to go into projects. Even if it's in Singapore, it's a lot of time at field, and on weekends. Not my priority at the moment.

I know, I am damn choosy. 

So for the near term plan where there is a reduced workload, I'll continue staying in my company, as long as they continue to employ me. However, this is only the short term plan. 

In the long term, extensive travelling is not sustainable for a home with growing kids. The best way is to have a new job that requires less travelling (And is easy enough for me to just work my 9 -5 and bring nothing home). But I am so choosy not only in the job but in the culture. I cannot work in an environment where I'm being micromanaged. I need an environment where I have the freedom to choose how to get things done to achieve the required goals while following the rules within the SOPs. I suck at jobs or environment where the boss tells you to do A, followed by B, C, D and so on. I hate unflexible work hours because I have been spoilt for years with flexible work hours (come anytime between 7.30 to 10 a.m.) and go home after 9 hours.

I want to work in parts of Singapore where you can rely on the cheap public transport (i.e. bus, MRT). This means, no deep inside Tuas South, Jurong Island and so on. I have spent my first part of my careers in such areas. These are not where I want to be. 

You know what? After listing all these above, I know what's my next move.

Tell you more next time.

How much I spend on 3 Kids a month.

Many people say that kids are one of the largest expenses you can have. I have 3 kids, and this is how much I spend on them per month.

1. Childcare

I am not ready to engage any domestic helper. Hence, while I am at work, the childcare centre will help me engage my kids. There are many reasons why I didn't opt for a domestic helper, but perhaps that will be in another post. My youngest is in infant care, and my two others are in childcare. After government subsidy, this come to a whooping $1,800 ($800 for infant care, and $500 each for childcare).

There are occasional outings at the childcare centre. I only let my eldest go, as I feel kids before the age of 3 are unable to appreciate or remember where they have been to. These excursions average $20 per month (so are more expensive like watching a play, while some like going to the library are just a few dollars).

Total per month for childcare: $1820

2. Enrichment

Following the same concept as excursion, only my eldest goes for enrichment. For just 2 enrichment per month, I spend $300.

Total per month for enrichment: $300

3. Milk

I have three kids. All of them are on different milk

The infant is drinking breast milk, so I do not buy milk powder for my baby. I pump most of the milk with a modestly priced breast pump, Spectra 9 which cost about S$100. I have used this for years, and it's still working. And I also have a spare. I have used this for all my 3 kids, and this is an excellent pump, worth its price.

If you want to store a lot per bag, consider this. I store about 300ml ++ per bag inside (I know it is above the capacity), and I use about 120 pieces per month. 

If you are going for a lesser quantity per pack, this is cheaper:

I also bought a freezer. It's a one time fee, so it's not included in my monthly calculation.

My 2- year old is on full cream milk powder (not formula milk). It costs about $60 per month.

My 4- year old is on UHT milk, and it costs about $20 per month.

Total amount spend per month on milk: $100

4. Insurance

I bought medishield plus rider for all of them. This cost about $162 per month for all three of them.

5. Diapers and Wet Wipes

My eldest is fully toilet trained, so no more diapers. But my two others are still on diapers which I buy here when it's on discount. They cost me about $70 per month in total for both of them. For wet wipes, I buy from value shop ($1 per pack), and this is at most $10 per month.

Total for diapers and wet wipes: $80

6. Food

I usually grit my teeth when I eat out with my kids, so I have been cooking for the most of the time. This actually cut down a lot of my food cost too. On average, I spend $100 per week on groceries. I can't differentiate theirs from mine, so I shan't. Though I guess most of the grocery cost is for me than them. They just eat one small bowl each per meal? Anyway, I just take the total cost of $400 per month.

Total for food: $400

7. Medical

This is for injections, doctor visits and so on. Most vaccines are government-subsidized, but we took those recommended as well. Together with other doctor visits, this is about $100 for all three of them per month. One tip, go to a polyclinic for doctor visits, you'll save a lot. One of my children had dry skin, and got a moisturizer. The cost of it is less than $2. Nice!

8. Activities at home

Kids need to be entertained continuously. I used to buy toys, but stopped as I feel that they do not need so many toys, and also because my home is going to become a junkyard for toys. Nonetheless, they still need many things to keep them occupied. These include stickers, color pencils, origami paper, books, and so on. I buy them from Value Shop. For about $1, you can get a 12- colored color pencil set. 

On average, I spend $10 per month in this category. 

9. Excursions

I bring my kids out. This range from free activities such as to the playground, park, library and so on, to paid ones such as the swimming pool, Uncle Ringo, Zoo, and so on.

I'll include items I buy for the trip to free places (e.g. kids scooter and tricycles, etc.).

On average, I spend $100 per month.

10. Clothes/ Shoes

I buy them only when needed. I don't see any value in having too many clothes or shoes since they outgrow them quickly. My younger and youngest wear those that my eldest can't wear, so I just spend on one person. This is about $20 per month. Buy online. $20 can last much longer.

Total Amount spent per month on three kids is about $3092

The One Thing You can Control at Work

This article was sparked from dropping my eldest at the enrichment centre. Before I left her for class, I told her to "Enjoy Youself!". Then I stayed for a short moment while she walked in, and overhead many parents telling their kids like "Pay attention.", "Speak loudly today." "Get more stars (the teacher will give a number of stars according to their performance)", and so on. None asked their kids to enjoy. Seems like the focus is performance.

Well, let me set it right. I expect my child to pay attention in class, and speak up when she knows the answer or have some stuff to say. My intention of enjoyment is definitely NOT just playing other things while the teacher teaches. However, what I hope is through the class, she finds things that she enjoys. It's a Chinese enrichment class. So it could be finding enjoyment in reading, listening, or interacting with others in Chinese. Whatever it is, as long as she enjoys something from the lesson. Whether she shows that she is the best or read the loudest in the class is not essential, unless that's something she enjoys.

This makes me wonder, instead of hoping for a smooth day at work, or a fruitful day and so on, why don't we enjoy a day at work? Instead of focusing on the things that we do not enjoy at work, why not complete all the tasks and at the same time, be mindful of the things that we enjoy and really savour it. Make that the highlight of the day. After all, we could be spending more time at work than anything else. This enjoyment could be doing an analysis that you are passionate about, reading up on a work related topic that interests you, talking to a colleague to understand more about what they do, negotiating with your favorite client, savoring the delicious coffee in pantry, working with a software that is only available in your company's computer, and so on.

For most of us, we can't fully control who our boss is, what we need to do, how our clients react, and so on.  These are external factors that have too many dependent variables. However, we definitely can control our mindset, and this in turn controls how we behave or react to things.

You have chosen to work today, so enjoy your day at work!

A Parent's thoughts on time vs money

As a parent, I want to give the best to my children. And as much as I could, to provide them with the opportunities and exposures. Undoubtedly, money gives one a higher chance of accessing resources, beneficial to giving my kids a head start in future. With this belief, I persevered in my current job, where I spend about 30% of my time out of the country, away from my young children. 

With the money I get out of my job, I outsourced childcare to childcare centres (so that I can continue working). When I am overseas, my partner looks after the kids at night, outsourcing childcare to TV when it becomes unmanageable. 

Have my kids benefited from the my fruit of labor at work (aka money)?

What have I benefited from the relentless work?

Is the cash gained from this job really worth the sacrifice?

If I derive joy from joy from my job, gain valuable experience, perhaps it's worth it. But, what if the job just becomes a transaction between time and money?

I'm leaving my current job, without plans for next. To many, they may say it's an irresponsible plan for a parent. But to me, this is one of the most responsible thing I'm going to do for my children.

While this is the first time since after graduation when I live without a pay, I have enough buffer. Living frugally, this could last me some time. 

The benefits of taking 16 weeks of maternity leave consecutively

Mothers of Singaporean children, who are legally married, and have worked continuously for a company for at least three months, will get 16 weeks of maternity leave in Singapore. There are some flexibility in this leave, which you can find out more here. You need to take the first 8 weeks consecutively, and the subsequent 8 weeks can be taken over the next 12 months. However, some companies may have different requirements over such flexibility.

I know of many who take the first 12 weeks consecutively, and then take the other four weeks (i.e. 20 days for a five- day work week job) as and when they need.

This is my second time taking maternity leave, and like previously, my choice is to take the 16 weeks consecutively, and I would advocate this if things are generally well, based on my experience.

There are many advantages, namely:

(1) You can spend 16 weeks of time with your newborn, focusing attention just on the baby -- (almost) no work.

Most company generally make arrangements for the long stretch of maternity leave. Or at least, that's the case for the company I am working for. During this period, there are very few (almost no) phone calls, and the requirement for you to check and reply email is very low (close to nil for my company). The work obligation required during this continuous stretch of maternity leave is very different from that required from you when you are on a few days leave. Why not just spend this 16 weeks in one go, and focus on your new born, (almost) free from work?

True, after your maternity leave, you may need to take time off for your child's vaccination, some clinic trips, and so on which demand leave. But, don't forget, you also have 6 days of childcare leave (for mothers of Singaporean children) and annual leave for that same year in addition to maternity leave.


(2) You can literally save on a month's worth of childcare. 

If you are getting external help for childcare, you will need to pay for the entire month, even if you skip childcare for a few days. By going back to work later, your kid can also start childcare later.


(3) Less disruption to your employer

The first time I took 16 weeks of maternity leave was because that's the preferred choice of my employer. For them, it is easier for them to plan their resource, and work if we take 16 weeks consecutively. I guess, while it's different for different employers, a continuous leave of 16 weeks brings more certainty to them.

The Hard Truth about Employees and Companies

Have you heard or yourself made such comments before:

"How could the company be retrenching people when they are making profits?"

"Why can't the company provide us with more benefits, they are so rich, it's just peanuts to them." 

"Why does the company only ask me to work, but never send me for any training?"

"I sacrificed so much family time for the company, why am I not promoted?" 

Whenever I read or hear such comments, it just make me wonder why do people not realize the truth about the relationship between employees and companies? As a corporate warrior for nine years and counting, each year only reminds me more firmly about this hard truth. 

Companies exist to accomplish the vision of the owners. It could be to leave a legacy, fulfill their dreams, make money or whatever. It's never, I repeat, NEVER for the employees. To a company, employing an employee is a transaction. A transaction for a service the employee can provide for the firm, to allow it to achieve the vision. This is similar to you going to the hairdresser for a haircut. The hairdresser gives you a haircut and you pay him or her. Or you going to the supermarket to buy milk. You get the milk, the supermarket gets the money. Simply, a transaction. 

To be blatant, employees are just a pawn to accomplish the vision of a company, in return for something (money or pay). To allow the pawn to help achieve the company's goals, some companies may provide training, have good benefits and so on. But the ultimate goal is to ensure that the pawn helps it achieve the target.

So what benefit does the pawn get? 

While we understand that companies exist for themselves (the owners), it does not mean that the employee is always at the losing end. For one thing, the company has to pay the employee for the work which allows the employee to accumulate and work on this  pennies to create his/her wealth. As employees, we should make full use of the opportunity when given to work for this company. How you make full use really depends on your ultimate goal. It could be to earn reputation in a certain area to spring board your career, gain experience, learn a new skill through doing, and of course build wealth from the pay. 

Since companies exist for their own goals, the pawns (employees) exist for their own goals as well. 

Once you understand this hard truth, you will know that no one owes anyone a living. The company employ you for the service they want from you, and you agreed to provide them with such service to the required standards. If the company wants you to make sacrifices that you are against your goals, then it's your job to prevent that. 

Remember, it's a transaction. 

Why my partner and I manage our finances separately

My partner and I have almost separate finances.

The only item that is many under both our names, is the present home that we are living in. Our mortgage repayment is done 50- 50 and deducted directly from CPF. We have no joint bank accounts (except the one that the bank made us open for the mortgage for cash top- ups, if required. The value in it is $0 for now), no credit cards under both's names, or whatsoever. And we are living very well under such arrangement.

Both of us are working, and are able to support ourselves prior to the marriage. And both of us  intend to continue working after marriage. Hence, why should marriage change how we manage our finances? In addition, we understand and respect one another's differences. As such, the decision for separate finances.

One Ground Rule

We have only one ground rule regarding each others' finances -- Whatever we do, we must spend within our means (no debt, except for housing which we can be in debt for). 

Divide and conquer for shared expenses

My partner and I divide our shared responsibilities, and work on them individually, consulting each other when required. Our thoughts are that it is easier to focus on just a few items, and do them well, than to work together on every single thing.

For shared expenses, such as utility bills, conservancy charges, home broadband, and property tax, etc., we divide such bills among ourselves, such that overall, the total bills each of us pay is roughly the same. So my partner is responsible for utility bills and property tax, while I am in charge of conservancy charges and home broadband. The person who is totally in charge of the bill, is in charge totally on it, from paying its expense, to the choice of vendor, coming up with ways to lower expenses (especially for utilities, and so on).

For our functional home project, each of us is in- charge of (the expenses) of a few rooms. Of course, in this case, there are more discussions since we will both be using same rooms.   

For kids, I am in charge of childcare/ education, while my partner is in charge of everything else (insurance, food, milk powder, etc.).

As for groceries, eating out and so on, we never go dutch for each such trips. It will be a hassle. It's hard to divide and conquer this piece of expenses. Hence, we just take turns to pay, or the one who spends more pays. We never count the number of times or track these, but rather just go by gut feel. That's it.

Apart from that, we pay for our individual shopping, insurances, entertainment, outings with friends and whatever. How much each of us spend, save, and so on, is none of each of other's business, as long as  you don't get the other person into serious financial problems. Our net worth are also not related to one another.

Advantages of having separate finances

While marriage is usually a merger of two people's lives, keeping finances separate has its many advantages.

The couple may have different goals in life. One may want to lead a life like Mr. Money Mustache, while the other aspire to live a life a more luxurious life. One may want to retire as soon as possible, but the other may find working engaging and wants to work as long as he/she can. There is no right and wrong, as long as we live responsibly (i.e. live within ones' means). 

In addition, it is easier to have control of yourself than others. For instance, if you want to increase savings, it is easier to implement it by lowering expenditure and/ or increasing earnings.

I believe in fairness and being responsible for your actions. If both the couple are gainfully employed, why should one person spend another person's hard- earned money? If only one of person is interested in expensive hobbies like golfing or photography, it doesn't make sense for the other to pay for it. If you don't earn a lot, what gives you the right to spend your partner's money to satisfy your desires?

Finances is one of the most frequent source of conflict between couples, and it usually arise due to disagreement with how each manage them. By keeping it separate, and respecting how each of us manage our finances (as long as it is reasonable), it is likely to minimize conflicts.

How $60,000 is gone before 2017...

I was evaluating my expenses to be for 2017.

Unlike previous years, where I have no mortgage to pay for, there is mortgage for 2017, and other additional. Hence, 2017 seems likely to be a year of high expenses.

Except for the home that we bought, my partner and I have totally separate finances, so his expenses are not included here. It's astonishing that even before 2017 starts, almost $60,000 is likely to be out! Do you have this problem like me? Some of the items can actually be cut down. Like cable TV, but it's at my parents' place... And the amount is small, compared to insurance and endowment, which easily eats up about 20% of the likely expenditure. Ridiculous.

Unless I do something about insurance and endowment, it's likely that I will need to spend $65,000 or more 2017. I am keeping $65,000 as the maximum target for 2017. I hope to spend lesser than that. Variable will be about $490 per month. Welcome austerity...

Fixed Expenses  - $59,130
$5050 for insurance (this includes a life insurance which takes up a huge portion of it; some term insurances, and health insurances)
$8000 for endowment plan;
$24,000 for parents
$15,000 mortgage (estimated)
$600 for Ang Baos
$480 for cable tv
$6000 childcare (estimated)

Others - $5870
which will comprise all other expenses, like taxes (property and income taxes), food, transport, entertainment, medical, etc., etc. That will leave just $490  per month for me myself then to keep to $65,000. Welcome austerity.